Back again

...........It seems i was right... again. I totally forgot about this site forgot that i wrote what i wrote which in all fairness works in my favour cause i found it equally as amusing the second time round of reading it.

Nothing much has changed, sister popped out the baby all very sweet an stuff but thats about it.

I have yet to learn the aggressive after affects of alcohol and still dont really know what i want to be in the foreseeable future.

I have however enlarged my future by sticking a man into it... i guess i was slightly bored on my own and there was only so much of that cats company i could endure in. He's an amazing guy a total geek and more then weird..... just the kinda guy i need some might say.

Im still shaving deaths door however it is far from self inflicted this time its down to the weather... ill moan when its raining.. hell ill moan when its too hot but by god when its icy its just wrong on the many weather levels there is, i do not understand mother natures logic for us all breaking bones and ice skating everywhere. I have however learnt a very valuable lesson whilst laying on the floor not so far from my home after one of my very many close ups of the pavement that wearing smooth shoes whilst rushing will resort in nasty accidents... this lesson i will carry for the rest of my life.. possibly because the scar on my elbow will remind me.

Often i have 'life' thoughts whilst not being in work because im ill or at a weekend when im hungover anytime that im forced to stay on the sofa all day really i mean its a hard job staying awake for all that daytime tv. I decided being that the cats pushing 7 now i probably should get him insured (you should have seen the look on his face when asking for his DOB) i made one up.... It seems that if hes pushed i mean jumps out a window and dies i get £650!! Think about this, if he lives the rest of his life and dies of natural causes it seems i get nothing... can anyone actually see the logic here?? So ok as a pet owner ive grown pretty fond of him an all that but at which point do i decide that its probably the best time to give him a nudge... how long do these things actually live for? knowing my luck he will outlive me. Also the fact that I dont actually own a window that i could launch him out of without scaring the kid next door for life anyway......god damn it!

Along with my 'life' thoughts i got thinking about my past friends people who i left behind when leaving hell AKA London and i got thinking about a dear friend (loose term....very loose) Phillip more because i was talking to him at the time. As bitter as this old man has grown to be i do love him and hes a very important part of my past that im blessed to have brought forward into my future. Hes like an episode of Easterders.... hes died twice, everything bad that could ever possibly have happened has and hes bitter come to think of it he lives in North London too..... despite all the old sods faults hes been there for me, a rock when i have needed him the most and is truly family to me maybe i should start to appreciate him more. I do love you Phillip... you twat!

Anywho all this thinking took up at least 30 minutes of my sick day so i got back to watching the Oooglies... inspiring programme if anyones seen it?

Well thats me done..... ill probably blog again next year

Life

Blogging, Ok i can do it...... i say this and will probably never write another one and forget it ever existed but for now i shall blog away whilst remembering its here

After shaving deaths door today i got thinking about life (this was in and out of consciousness and watching Tv) my thoughts were in forms of questions like 'Why are we here?' 'What do i want to be when i grow up?' 'When will i learn that alcohol does not love me back?' you know... the normal questions and found i have no answers. I lost interest pretty quick when trying to find out why we are here and decided i was being punished by someone i had clearly upset in a previous life (at this point i had just sicked £47 worth of a good night out and was feeling a little sorry for myself).... anywho moving quickly onto my second question of what i want to be when i grow up ah yes see now that's a good question, i have decided that i don't know took me ages but that's all i came up with. At 21 with maybe just a little VAT 'they' class me as an adult i mean come on its more then clear after last nights antics i am not ready to hold such a title. After believing that i actually did die in my sleep last night it got me thinking about what i want from life and where i see myself going i have spent the last 7 years blaming Disney for my unrealistic expectations of men so have decided that where ever i choose to paint my path there will be no man trotting along next to me in this. So after coming to the conclusion that i am maybe a little too lumpy to become a model, far too lazy for a fireman and just have no interest in working with children (heave) i am left with very little to do so have settled for the idea of becoming a wag i mean sure it will take some adjusting to but im sure i will manage.

After picking up 200 (in reality hungover felt like 16000 it took me 1 hour and 15 minutes) cotton buds from the bathroom floor this morning i got thinking about how lucky i am to share this life with the amazing people i have been blessed with i mean sure it weighs out with the neighbours i suffer with and the men that get thrown my way every now and then to remind me just how much i love that cat of mine but no im talking about family and friends. I have been blessed with a friend as well as a sister who at times i want to stick in a blender with ice cubes but my life would be empty without her, she has blessed me with 2 totally amazing nephews and as if that didn't cost me.... i mean bless me enough shes soon to throw in a third who i cannot wait to meet. My sister is my world don't get me wrong she is on a level that not even Mork and Mindy would reach but i wouldn't if given the chance change her for the the world as she too makes me appreciate that cat haha ok no i am only joking i love her more then i believe she will ever understand.

My father...... an odd man, i love him sure i love him but i don't understand him and i guess i should probably give up trying too. I would like to think that we have an understanding i love him he loves me but we don't actually have to speak for years on end to know this. In reality i should really make more of an effort with him as he is my father and i truly do love him i just have to understand that he has his own ways of dealing with things and me but he wont be around forever so from today i decided to make more effort to keep in contact ill even go to see him on his birthday this year :)

My Nigel (apparently a cat) spends most of his life wanting attention, breaking things, scratching me oh and eating my plants... if you could imagine a ADHD suffier packed full of sugar whilst bored that's him. He will go to any length to get attention if it means throwing himself on the floor knowing that you have no time to redirect yourself or stop so you either risk squashing him or fall whilst throwing Coco pops over the sofa he'll do it.... and THEN look offended whilst your singally picking each CoCo pop out of his fur!! But i mean all this makes it sound like hes not a blessing to me and he is, after living alone for the first time last year he has given me true reason to come home and never fails to be waiting for me somewhere with a cuddle

Finally my mum a woman i will forever admire, respect and adore a woman that shows me even when im ready to give up on everything that there is reason to carry on someone who has had a rough time of it herself but still remains optimistic and strong minded. A woman that will always fight back no matter how low shes is and will forever remain on top of a situation. Shes strong and independent and the best friend i will ever have. Shes my world and every day i will tell her how much she means to me and how loved she really is. My mum is my rose, my life, my reason for happiness and most of all my world. A woman that will have an answer for everything and my god i mean everything and will always say whats on her mind. I used to think as a child (as kids do) that she placed an eyeball in each room of the house because nothing got past her, i still to this day believe she has planted these balls in my flat however i know her reason is for caring therefore im happy under her watchful eye. I love her with every emotion possible and i have decided i want to be her when i grow up.......

So there you have it, my little world its only taken me 2 hours and 27 minutes i mean this morning i wouldn't string a sentence together and was having real problems with my hand and mouth coordination so i think i may be on the mend.

Good day

PS i would like to stress that i am unhappy i was allowed by my friends to go out with 2 beavers over my eyelids (fake eyelashes) last night

Thank you..... twats